Note: Ughhhh, this was a hard one for me to post. You will understand the more you read on. If even just 1 person feels inspired/they’re not alone after reading this, it would have been worth it. Vulnerability, ftw!! (Haha I actually say things like that irl.)
It’s been awhile since I’ve done a Fitness post here. Truthfully, it’s because I haven’t been all that happy about my recent progress. I’m just going to say it (err, type it): I have gained weight, 20 lbs. to be exact. This is not a pity-post. It is the fitness post to help me be more accountable for my fitness goals. It is the post where I open up a little more because I know that you have probably gone through this too. Maybe you’re even going through it right now. As a “lifestyle” blogger, I feel like I need to blog about the realities of my life and not just the positive/motivating stuff all the time. As much as I enjoy sharing my favourite beauty products or recipes, I enjoy sharing life lessons, stories and struggles a bajillion times more. And more than anything, I aim for honestly out here, even though it’s sometimes a little embarrassing. (I wasn’t kidding when I said that my blog absolutely reflects how I am irl.)
Side note: If you’d like to comment but aren’t comfortable doing so publicly, you can always email me at holler(at)beautyandabite.com and I’m happy to chat.
LOL I can’t say I haven’t thought of these before
The latter half of 2013 was terrible for me in terms of my fitness. Shit was going on in my personal life that really derailed my focus. I let it derail my focus and when I realized this, I became even more sad about it. So sad that instead of picking myself back up, I did the complete opposite. I stopped going to the gym regularly. I started eating out on a regular basis and stopped cooking my own clean meals. I binged – I would eat boxes of chocolate in one night and eat so much that I would feel like throwing up (seriously). I became embarrassingly lazy, choosing to spend my free days at home and distracting myself instead of being accountable and doing the one thing I was so proud to finally be doing when I decided I wanted to live a healthier lifestyle. I stopped doing. I went right back to day dreaming, right back to where I started when I was overweight and felt that I didn’t have control of my life. I found myself saying, “I’ll start tomorrow/Monday/next week/ in 2014/ in the summer, etc.” – something I told myself I would never say again. I had disappointed myself in so many ways and I didn’t know what to do. How do you save yourself from yourself?!
The holiday break really helped me. I had a chance to be with myself again. To think, write and talk to myself. My daily routine in 2013 was exhausting, to say the least. I was always “ON” and no longer had time to spend with myself. I didn’t realize how drastically this toxic routine was affecting my life. Little by little, I lost touch with myself.
Before the new year arrived, I had a hard look at my life and came to one conclusion: I need it back. I needed my life back. I needed to put myself first again, not my problems. I needed to worry less. I needed to stop planning to do things and just do them.
This is how I put together my 2014 list.
What I’m Doing Now:
**** I re-read my older blog posts and realized that all I needed to do was to take my own advice. Focus on myself. Put my priorities first. START DOING. ***
- I have put restraints back on myself and have re-implemented my own “Rewards” program, which I talk about in more detail here.
- I am back to cooking my own meals and eating healthy (for the most part). This has always been a challenge for me, but I am doing much better. Like, only one box of chocolates a night instead of 4 (hahaha jk jk). I post my healthy meal ideas on my Instagram if you’d like to take a peek!
- I am following a 12-week fitness program that’s realistic, but challenging. In 2013, I ended up just “going with the flow” and did not have a solid program to follow. (I get my fitness programs from Bodybuilding.com)
- I stopped comparing myself to others. I realize I only do this when I feel bad about myself – it’s like I want myself to feel like shit. (What the fuck, right? Why do we do this to ourselves?)
- I am back to taking progress photos every 2 weeks. The first few are always the hardest to look at, but I know that they will not only start to look better, but I will start to look happier in them, too. I know this because I experienced the same thing back in 2010 when I first started to live healthier.
- I started to talk about this more openly. When the people around you realize what you’re going through, they will help you because they only want what’s best for you. (If they don’t, you need to take the Scissors of Life and snip away. Get it? Cut… them…. off… hehe.)
- I started tracking my daily fitness activities and my water/food intake, which is something I’ve never done before.
- I find myself reading my old motivation posts and old Instagram posts, too – another thing I love about blogging. I’ve got a record of my own mind set!
If you’re on the same boat,
Know that you’re not alone. Know that slow progress is progress, so don’t be so hard on yourself. And my last and probably most important advice is that the only person you should try to please is yourself. Put yourself first and the rest will follow.
Thanks for reading this whole post if you did! Feel free to comment below if you’ve experienced this before and what you did to get yourself out of it.